Communicating with people with disability is not hard
Starting conversations with people with disability is daunting. It’s not hard to start a conversation. You already know how to have a conversation with anyone and with a person with disability, it’s just a little different… Western Sydney University provides some useful tips and practical advice in this simple information sheet.
We all know communication is vital to developing and maintaining relationships effectively. When dealing with someone with disability, able-bodied people are perhaps at a disadvantage because we become uncomfortable with the silence and the long wait for an answer. It’s almost like, their disability turns back onto us.
Slow down…you need to slow down, depending on the disability, you may need to slow right down. Ask a single question and wait for the answer. Stay attentive and engaged and just wait. They are thinking, they are processing what you’ve said or asked.
Change and meeting new people is always difficult for people on the spectrum. Seeing the person, not the disability means speaking directly to the person, not about them. Although some really struggle with eye contact and may not look you directly in the eye, they still want to engage and be included. They may feel threatened by your intense eye contact so stay engaged, it’s okay to look down or around.
Signals… people on the spectrum respond well to verbal and non verbal cues and signals such as a simple ‘thumbs-up’ Key Word Sign can make a huge difference to their understanding and comprehension. It’s important to keep using natural facial expression, body language and clear natural gestures, because they also give a lot of information.Communicating complex ideas is more challenging and you’ll often need to break the idea down into easily digestible chunks. For example, using a twisting hand motion to explain how to open a lock on a door, assists the listener to more easily able combine the visual cue against the spoken word, which further increases understanding.
Timing and Tone… The most important thing is to pick the right moment to communicate your request. And this begins with getting the person’s attention first. Use their name clearly and wait a few moments for their response. Maybe as long as 15 to 20 seconds and if needed, move forward into their line of vision and repeat it once more. Remember, their acknowledgement may be non-verbal, with just a simple look. Once acknowledged, give a short, simple, direct, one sentence, instruction. Check and wait for understanding to take root.
Take note, complying with your request, may be because the person might not understand what you said, and may just go along with things to please you, cover their misunderstanding (masking) or because of your insistence.
Use a normal tone of voice, don’t raise your voice. Be polite and patient. Speak slower, not louder.
Positive Reinforcement… Avoid negative language with people with disability because it’s discouraging and destructive. Instead use positive feedback and language when supporting them to change their behaviour. Use encouraging phrases such as 'well done’, and ‘you tried really hard’ or ‘you did it!’ and use positive gestural reinforcement such as a ‘high five’, where appropriate. Positive, rather than negative reinforcement, helps people with intellectual disability or spectrum disorders to make right choices and stop acting in ways that may not be socially acceptable. Explaining the impact and consequences of anti social negative behaviour, is done in an affirming and encouraging way, detailing why it doesn’t work. For example, when we do this… people feel that…contrasting one with the other.
Positive reinforcement allows us to tap into their individual strengths and encourages curiosity, creativity, independence and improves their self-esteem. Changing behaviour does take time and for a people with disability it may take longer but there are rewards for them and you, if you’re a parent struggling with your child’s behavioural issues.
Consistency is one of the big issues when working with people on the spectrum. They need to know that a NO is a NO and a YES is a YES because they don’t easily accept sudden unreasonable change. Don’t promise what you can’t deliver. Don’t use conditional rewards based on ‘if’ statements. Use ‘when’. For example, when you do this, we can do that.
For simple tips on communication see Australian Federation of Disability Organisations.
If you want to learn more about this and feel better equipped for communicating with people in your life, give me a call on 0421 224 070 at Counselling Solution, Forster NSW.